Week 7 Recap

Hi Drew and Eli-

Sorry for the delayed recap. I wanted to let the basketball preview marinate at the top spot a little longer. See you guys in the comments,

Edwin

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Cover Tooth (4-3) 152.00
Stanton For Heisman! (2-5) 101.75

What Happened: Despite a Questionable tag all week, newly acquired Darren McFadden went insane, scoring 42.00 points for Welty-- the highest tally in the VUFSA this year. (Arian Foster had 41.50 in week 1.) In addition to McFadden, Roddy White (26.50) and Knowshon Moreno (19.50) also had big days in a runaway for Adam.

MVP: McFadden. Despite almost not playing, and despite the presence of Michael Bush, he played what is the game of the year so far for his 3rd VUFSA franchise this season. (6th overall)

Least VP: Dave Tomke's WRs- outside of Mario Manningham and his late score, they only tallied 11 points between the three of them.

Jay Cutler Says: "Ow my organs. But also, hahahaha suck it McDaniels."

What it means: Welty has now won four in a row since starting 0-3, and depending on how McFadden plays the rest of the way, he could be a major postseason contender.

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Stanzi Loves America (5-2) 147.50
1-800-222-1222 (1-5) 118.00

What Happened: Huge output by the starting RBs for Stem, after failing him last week. Michael Turner (26.00), Adrian Peterson (22.00) and Thomas Jones (18.00) all play excellent. The game was well in hand before the Favre-Rodgers Sunday Night duel, which Rodgers won decisively 17.25-5.00.

MVP: Probably should be Turner, who I called a bum last week, but I'm going with "Steve Johnson." He scored 17.00 points despite the obvious handicap of me not knowing who he is or what team he plays for. Wow- that's deep research from Stem.

Least VP: Noted sexual predator Brett Farve, who was not only terrible, but a complete asshole about his ankle.

Jay Cutler Says: "Brett Farve is a little too careless with the ball, even for my tastes."

What it means: A move to first place for Stem, now owning the highest point total in the league through seven weeks. Tough loss for Baron

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Awkward Emoticons ;) (5-2) 79.50
Suhsiccal (3-4) 109.00

What Happened: Two stunning performances from Lee Evans (27.00 on 3 TDs) and DeAngelo Hall (21.50) start the upset, and an underwhelming performance by most of Drew's lineup finishes it off. JR didn't have the monster week he could have, with Kenny Britt's 33 points on the bench, but the win is all that matters. Still, file this away in case JR needs a tiebreaker late in the year.

MVP: Evans, who made the three benched Britt TDs palatable.

Least VP: Wes Welker (3.00) who looks very ordinary since Randy Moss was traded.

Jay Cutler Says: "Not fair, bro. I don't know how anybody can be asked to account for the presence of DeAngelo Hall."

What it means: Drew sees no problem in complaining about Hall despite getting 20.25 points from James Harrison in a seven point win earlier this year. /bitterness

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Stranger in the Alps (3-4) 124.00
ChamPeons (4-3) 108.50

What Happened: Despite being awful, Drew Brees (16.25) managed a decent game. Despite having no Peyton Manning, Eli was able to keep pace at QB because of two TDs from Sam Bradford (14.25). It's odd that in getting BOTH Hakeem Nicks (22.50) and a 2nd rounder, Eli somehow looks like a chump in the McFadden deal through this substansive sample size of just Week 7.

MVP: Nicks, Eli's top scorer and decisive winner of the MNF Thunderdome, besting Roy Williams' non-existing effort.

Least VP: Matt Forte (4.50). Already having a rough time between a shitty line and a coordinator who doesn't call run plays- Forte fumbled away what could have been a decent game.

Jay Cutler Says: "[inaudible because a defensive lineman is sitting on his head]"

What it means: Champ misses a chance to get a little separation from the pack. Eli sits one game out of the playoffs despite giving up on Tuesday.

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Marty Booker (4-3) 79.75
Let My Monkeys Go (4-3) 94.50

What Happened: Both teams suffered horrific Sundays, so it was a tight game heading into Monday Night. Brandon Jacobs (10.50) had more than enough to edge out Miles Austin (2.50) and give Viano a comfortable win. Big game from Joe Flacco (24.00) plus nice games from Jamaal Charles and Anquan Boldin (13.00 ea) covered up mostly bad weeks from most of Andy's guys.

MVP: Flacco, who has been pretty damn close to a stud the last five weeks.

Least VP: So many to choose from, but Donald Driver's zero stands out in the losing effort.

Jay Cutler Says: "Tell Ed to stay the course. Just because things go badly once, doesn't mean you should make adjustments or stop altogether. Tell him to keep throwing into coverage off his back foot his head up.

What it means: The league lacks clarity in large part because of this outcome. Six teams currently sit with 4 wins or more, and eight teams have between 3 and 5. So, this means little as of right now.

VUFSA Basketball Preview

Image via BDL, who calls the photo "the perfect encapsulation of [Antoine Walker's] entire career in a single frame....look at Antoine shimmying while a play is going on behind him."

-Three polls returned. Game on.-

1. LeBrown Jones (Andy Viano)

An autodraft did not hurt Viano, as he picked up some really nice players- especially early. Where he will see the effects of the auto draft is in lineup construction- only one C eligible player currently on the roster. As a result, currently lacking in blocks and rebounds. That said, should not lose the STL category all year, with six great players in that category, including the best in the league in Chris Paul. Assuming swaps some STL and AST for REB and BLK, a very balanced team, who even as constructed should garner 5+ wins most weeks. Only weakness is at SG, although Paul Pierce is a solid, if not old, contributor every night. Concerned about health with Nene, and Pierce, but essentially it's nitpicking at that point.

2. Kurt Hinrich (Eli Gieryna)

An exceptional front line boosts the perennial contender. Fantastic draft, with a lot of high upside players/youth. The difference between a first place and a 4th place finish will be Blake Griffin. The guy holds the key to Eli's season- should be a beast on the boards and contribute points immediately. If he is hurt or doesn't live up to the hype, it becomes a bad 2nd round pick and really hurts. Griffin and David Lee could win REB by themselves, while JaVale McGee and Josh Smith should do enough to win BLK both weeks. Not a great shooting team, as the two best scorers (Evans and Anthony) hit about 46%- and they take a lot of shots. Only weakness I envision is PG if Holiday isn’ t consistent.

3. Get Some (Dave Tomke)

With America's Basketball Sweetheart Kevin Durant added to Brook Lopez and Stephen Curry, Dave has a reasonable claim to best keepers in the league (fighting w/ Stem and Viano). You can expect Dave to dominate FT% because Durant shoots more FTs than anyone in the league and makes 9 of 10 of them. A few question marks for Tomke, most notably Yao Ming. Yao was once a top tier player in the fantasy realm, and could be an extreme value if he is even relatively healthy. Good upside in Eric Gordon, another potential steal. Not spectacular, but very solid.

4. PeterHazeMuscleShirt (Ed Schillinger)

A strong scoring team, with three probable 20+ ppg players in Amare, Rose and Monta Ellis. Strong 3PT team, getting 'plus' contributions from four players, led by Danilo Gallinari. The key player for Edwin will have to be Derrick Rose- a great real life player who has fantasy deficiencies. If he can hit some threes and learn to play passing lanes, he should be a top-25 player at seasons end. If he is the same player as last year, Schillinger is headed for the middle of the pack. I think Horford will be solid, but Stoudemire could take a step back since he’ s not playing with Steve Nash anymore. Could use some help in the BLK category, with Roy Hibbert his only real standout.

5. Hobo Jesus (Andrew Stem)

A nice blend of exquisite keepers + young talent. Wade and Kobe will probably pace Stem to an undefeated record in the PTS column. Added great 3PT snipers in the draft via Jason Richardson and Rashard Lewis. What he gets out of DeMarcus Cousins and Evan Turner will determine how high he gets- if those two turn out well it could end with Stem on the top step of the podium. Really weak at C, does not have any kind of shot-blocking threat and is lukewarm rebounding.

6. Panironmegadreamlca (Adam Welty)

Really nice draft, getting 2-3 elite talents early. Will definitely need a full season from Marcus Camby to have any hope of competing in BLK. The PFs on the roster are negatives in this category. Weak at forward/center positions. Brandon Jennings is unbelievably fast, a very strong STL and 3PT player. He does shoot the ball a ton, and misses 60% of the shots he takes. Ben Gordon and Hedo Turkoglu also drag down that category. Needs a good bounceback from Turkoglu. After a total bust in Toronto, he's placed in a great offense in Phoenix, a chance to work off the ball score. Deron Williams is an immaculate, no flaw player who should pace Welty into the playoffs.

7. Present. (Drew Wolf)

Despite constantly professing his disinterest, Drew has built a very nice club. Should make the playoffs as long as he sets his lineups. Despite having three great big men, really looks strongest on the perimeter in 3PT and AST. Rajon Rondo will control the AST category and dominate STL. Really nice FT team as well. Glbert Arenas will...I don’ t know. Maybe get a surgically implanted bionic arm like Jax from Mortal Kombat. You can't be sure. (~Welty) Age and injuries could be an issue with this team.

8. No Argument Here (Baron Brendel)

Baron has a lot of nice talent, but doesn't add up to an especially good team. It's a well-balanced team that does nothing really well. Won't dominate any category week to week, except for maybe OREB. The team's best scorer is Stephen Jackson- but for all he brings to the table for PTS, 3PT and STL, but takes just as much off by shooting 1400 times at 42%. Kidd, Billups, Devin Harris and Vince Carter all fall below 43% as well. Carter and Billups will probably shoot 1000+ times on top of it as well. Average 3PT potential despite the lack of points. Nice upside potential with Anthony Randolph, who will contribute some nice BLK numbers and is fun to watch. Josh Childress is intriguing, but I wonder how many minutes he'll get in Phoenix, and how well he'll play this year after his absence from the US.

9. Bango's Bitches (JR Radcliffe)

The headline here is clearly THREE PF/Cs that won't start the season. Andrew Bynum in fact, won't be back until December. Dwight Howard can cover up a lot of that, but having only 9 active players available for the season's first month means JR will have to climb into the playoffs from what could be a deep hole. Would be much higher if we were just ranking on overall talent, however, too many players are one dimensional (Allen, Maggette, Parker, Brooks). Overall a very efficient team, really good shooters with the exception of never being able to win FT%. Will challenge for the best 3PT team we have.

10. NBA Jam T.E (Brent Whitlock)

The defending champion suffered in the poll due to a lackluster keeper crew. Andy Bogut is a really good player and a great shot-blocker. Assuming no ill-effects from his gruesome elbow injury, he'll be a top-25* player in the league this year. Strong team on the glass between Bogut and Joakim Noah, but really, really lacks scoring. We face a real possibility that John Salmons could be the top scorer of the 12 guys currently compromising NBAJTE. Nice 3PT shooters and Steve Nash will have you compete in AST every week.


*As Eli has stated on this blog previously, he has about 8 or 9 players that he considers top-5 quarterbacks. I feel the same way here, where I consider about 40 players to be in the top-25.

Silencing the Noise

Welcome to a new feature on the newly-resurrected VUFSA blog, where I make fun of Brad Evans. In this brief introductory article, I will take one of Evans' signature long-winded posts and edit it in hopes of achieving more clarity.

The following passage is extracted from Yahoo's Week 7 Dissenting Opinions, found here. Click to read/view full-size.

Thank you. This has been an attempt to silence The Noise.

ONE MAN TO BEAT RETURNS

Drew posed an interesting query to me this week, regarding the amount of sellers we have in the league. The question is simple- when is the right time (if ever) to give up on a season? He and I agreed to debate the point as I resurrect my shitty old Torch Column (One Man to Beat- a riveting Ed Schillinger vs. Paul Oren point/counterpoint feature, for you youngsters) in my attempt to resurrect the VUFSA Blog.



"Oh my god! We're having a FIRE! sale." (EJS)

In all honesty, there's really NO bad time to start thinking about next year in the VUFSA. We don't play for a great deal of money, so it's not as if you can make decent coin by finishing second or third. In my mind, it's championship or nothing. We play for pride and sometimes a plaque.

That's not to say that you should never try to stage a run or try to climb out of the cellar. Tomke's football run last year (didn't win a game until Week 6, then won 10 straight and made it to the league championship) is a prime example of what can happen with persistence.

That's adorable and heartwarming and all, but facing facts- sometime shit just doesn't go your way. Someone got hurt. Someone got benched or traded. You have the most points scored against you in the whole league even though your point output is quite good. It's hard to dedicate yourself to rebuilding a fantasy team, and can be quite frustrating if the league is in one if it's no-player-movement funks. So when is time to cut bait?

You can't do it too early, because 1) that's just chicken shit and 2) everyone still loves their draft one month into the season. Plus, no one is out of anything during the first quarter of the season. You can't do it too late either, because 1) the market of buyers has shrunk and 2) you may miss out on a deal because another guy filled the other owner's hole.

The VUFSA has proven itself to be a stable league and the value of great keepers and extra draft picks bears itself out every season, it seems. Truth is, there is no perfect time to pull the plug, so anytime there's a good futures market for your players I maintain that THAT is the right time to give the fuck up and trade me all your players.



Hang in there Pal! (DRW)

For years now, I have written in "Souretorch" for league entry and now I feel as if I am living up to the Torch part of it. Chris Stuart, you and your knife, eat your heart out.

I hate giving up on the season. Hate it. Fantasy football is too much fun to sit on the sidelines for half or more of the season. If nothing else, our roto baseball league teaches us that you have to be consistently good for five to six months to be a top-3 finisher. Our head-to-head fantasy football league teaches us that with a good five to six week push sprinkled with a little luck, you are a playoff team.

Last year at this time, Jerome Harrison - yeah a Browns reference - was a complete non-factor in VUFSA and the NFL. Dude sets rushing records the last three or four weeks. Whadupwit dat? "Waiver Wire" Willie Parker is a VUFSA legend. And numerous others have come from the free agent depths to power a many team to VUFSA glory. How can you deny the opportunity to find the next great Maurice Jones-Drew?

What determines when and when not to pull the plug? For even though I hate it, I will concede that finishing 10th is no different than finishing 5th. That said, I do disagree with Edwin's championship or bust argument for a playoff finish is still money and pride worthy. I'm the guy who makes a trade in baseball to try and finish second instead of third (damn you John Danks for not pitching better). But, the lower seeds, well, who cares, right?

For starters, one needs look at his own team. It sounds obvious, but if all the guys are healthy and just haven't put together the right weeks at the right time, chances are it'll even out. If your starting quarterback is seeing stars, your big time running back is being outplayed by a rookie, and your starting tight end blew out his groin, there just aren't the pieces in places to make the surge. That said, where are your overall points? Are they in the top half of the league? Where are opponents points? Are they stupidly unfair?

90% of our league is within two weeks of clinching a playoff berth. With seven weeks to play, a three game winning streak is not all that unachievable to propel one's team to the victory brackets. No, I'm not going to get into tie breakers, but when faced with three wins in a row taking a look at the schedule to see where those upcoming games are coming. 50% of the league is .500 or worse and thereby games I designate as "winnable". Who's next? 1-5 followed by 3-3 with 2-4 there following? It's winnable. Got a game against one of the top dogs? Well, you have to beat one or two of them anyway to be a contender so might as well give it a shot.

Plus, dismantling a team is tricky business. You have to build for next year without asking for players that contending teams feel are necessary to this year's success. I personally have run into this conundrum more than once. How to obtain great young talent for next season with having minimal to offer as a bottom-feeder? Draft picks tend to be the way to go, but the VUFSA isn't exactly known for its wild wheeling and dealing. We tend to dabble in tight ends for 6th round pick territory and when rebuilding a club, just truly how valuable is that flex wide receiver next year? Eh. It's not impossible, but why hang your hopes on finding that next Broncos/Saints wide receiver when you could be fighting down to the wire?

Week 6 Recap

FUCK YOU GIANTS AND ED, YOU GOT LUCKY THIS TIME. -STANTON OUT-

Marty Booker(4-2) 121.50
Stanton for Heisman! (2-4) 119.00

What Happened: This is probably as close as you can get to a walk-off win in the VUFSA. Chris Johnson (19.00) took a handoff on 4th and 5, and ran 35 yards for a touchdown to overcome a 7.50 point deficit with under two minutes left on MNF. Maurice Jones-Drew never reentered the game. DeSean Jackson (17.50) was on his way to a historic day until he died. Jeremy Maclin picked up in his place and had an enormous game, scoring 22.50 on his own. Drew Stanton actually got to play this week, which hopefully provides Dave some consolation because it sucks to lose with 100 seconds left in the week.

MVP: Johnson. A nice game in and of itself, but his effort in garbage time with the Titans comfortably ahead made the difference.

Least VP: Miles Austin (1.00), who not only sucked within his own right, but didn't do anything but watch as Tony Romo threw three TDs for Tomke.

What it means: Dave is fucking wasted. And Ed stays in 3rd.

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Awkward Emoticons ;) (5-1) 137.75
Stanzi Loves America (4-2) 112.50

What Happened: Aaron Rodgers (20.50 pts) was able to take the field for Stem, but Drew countered with Greg Jennings, who offset 15 of those points. Virtual no-show days from RBs Jahvid Best and Michael Turner (9.50 combined) don't allow Stem to keep up with the great showing from Drew's RBs.

MVP: Jennings. Wasn't even the top scoring WR in this matchup, but to recoup all but five of the points that Rodgers out out was enormously helpful to Drew.

Least VP: Turner. The supposed stud RB has hit double digits in just 2 of 6 games this year.

What it means: Drew is alone in first and has a massive inside track not only for a playoff spot but for the #1 seed. Stem should be fine, good record and a strong point total.

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Let My Monkeys Go (3-3) 118.00
Stranger in the Alps (2-4) 113.00

What Happened: An exhilarating finish on Sunday Night, as Peyton Manning (21.25) and Ryan Torain (22.50) staged a furious comeback that came up short. Brandon Jacobs (15.00) came up huge, scoring twice to give Viano an actual RB1 effort.

MVP: Joe Flacco really stepped up, outscoring Manning with 23.75 points.

Least VP: Antonio Gates (1.50). Not only does the giant-assed TE put up a clunker of a game, but reports regarding the severity of his injury are varied.

What it means: Viano has risen back to .500 and actually sits a game ahead of Eli despite scoring 100 fewer points on the season. Eli has now lost four in a row.

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1-800-222-1222 (1-5) 96.00
ChamPeons (4-2) 102.25

What Happened: Drew Brees (25.25) went off, completely outclassing Mark Sanchez (7.25). Arian Foster (23.00) continued his domination, basically putting up QB-like numbers. That said, it was Roy Williams' (14.50) surprise two-TD game and late Redskin rally that pushed Champ just over the top.

MVP: Brees. Average games for the most part on Champ's card- but Brees was magnificent.

Least VP: Kevin Walter. Zero points while his Texans team put up 35.

What it means: Champ keeps chugging along and sits comfortably two games above .500. Baron starts fielding offers.

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Cover Tooth (3-3) 103.25
Suhssical (2-4) 84.25

What Happened: LaDanian Tomlinson (18.00) outscored his fellow Jet RB Shonn Green (4.00) by 14 points, giving Welty a big cushion after Sunday's action. That difference turned out to be more than enough to hold off three WRs and a K on Monday night, who didn't mount much of a charge anyway.

MVP: Tomlinson. Raise your hand if you thought he was a reach as a keeper. (Editors note: Raises hand)

Least VP: Hakeem Nicks (1.50), who put up his first real dud of the season.

What it means: The game provides a little more clarity in light of the Stanton-Booker game. Instead of being one of four 3-3 teams, Welty sits nicely at 5th, as one of two 3-3 teams. JR has some work to do, two games out of 4th and three teams to climb over. .

Week 5 Recap

It's funny because he's a sexual predator

Cover Tooth (2-3) 127.50
Stanzi Loves America (4-1) 109.25

What Happened: Kyle Orton excelled in place of Jay Cutler, and Weltys' WRs went off (48.5 between the three starters), holding off a pretty decent week for Stem. LaDanian Tomlinson had a nice game to stop any potential Adrian Peterson thunder.

MVP: Hakeem Nicks, who has been absolutely unstoppable 40% of this season.

Least VP: Lance Moore. It didn't impact this game much, but it's probably time to note that "every single Saints player" is no longer an every week flex option.

Brad Evans says, "A heavy, horrible week for the Stems, as they put their first pock in the loss colonnade. With a concussed QB heading into next week, Stem faces a Clooney-esque conundrum, as his status 'Up in the air' for an important matchup."

What it means: Welty hangs around in the playoff race, but more importantly, now it's Drew-Stem for sole possession of first place next week.

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Awkward Emoticons ;) (4-1) 115.50
1-800-222-1222 (1-4) 111.00

What Happened: Drew's starting QB scored one point and Baron could not capitalize, despite a huge Monday Night from Favre to Harvin. Terrell Owens keeps his tenuous grip on relevancy with 15.50 points.

MVP: The Broncos-Ravens game, which saw Brandon Lloyd rack up 20.50 points and Ray Rice 28.00.

Least VP: Mark Clayton('s patella tendon). Notched only 0.50 points, and took a nice trade chip away from Baron simultaneously.

Brad Evans says, "A billion people in China would love to have a RICE harvest as bountiful as Ray's on Sunday. The diminutive, darting, demon dominated a downtrodden Denver defense. Dodge, Duck, Dip, Dive, Dodge! lol"

What it means: Drew moves into first place and is the first VUFSA team to cross the 600 point mark on the year. Baron sits alone in 10th.

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Marty Booker (3-2) 127.00
Suhssical (2-3) 96.75

What Happened: The Titans-Cowboys late game shootout pumped up both teams, with five touchdowns and 75 combined points. Philip Rivers and Miles Austin each had huge games, while Matt Ryan and Reggie Wayne did not keep pace.

MVP: Chris Johnson, who continues his one up, one down trend this year. (His point totals by week: 28.0, 3.0, 24.0, 3.5, 25.5)

Least VP: An unfortunate nod to Jermichael Finley, exiting because of injury without registering a point.

Brad Evans says, "Stone-Cold Miles Austin dropped the stunner on the gravity-challenged-water-fowl fan club. The lama of the long-run CJ2k did his damage on the short runs, piling on a pair of perfect plunges from a single solitary yard out"

What it means: Schillinger moves to 3rd at 3-2, while JR falls into the morass of 2-3 clubs. Too early for a game like this to register too much meaning.

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Stanton for Heisman! (2-3) 113.75
Stranger in the Alps (2-3) 85.00

What Happened: Apparently, Eli forgot to set his lineup. That's my only explanation for the point total. Dave finally got a solid day from Brandon Jackson, plus goodness from Midget Jones-Drew and Adam Vinateri.

MVP: Michael Crabtree, who's 16 point showing in the night game gave Dave some breathing room.

Least VP: Peyton Manning and his 7.50, but in his defense- he would have needed 40+ with Eli getting just two touchdowns this week.

Brad Evans says, "The dynamic Dallas duo of slick and slender Tony Romo to the hulking and heaving Jason Witten drove daggers down into the beleaguered souls of Stranger fans across the region."

What it means: Dave pulls himself back up into relevancy, moving into the five-way tie for 5th. Eli has to hope his team shows up next week, having lost three in a row since starting 2-0.

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Let My Monkeys Go (2-3) 85.50
ChamPeons (3-2) 102.25

What Happened: Malcom Floyd went off, and Joe Flacco outdueled Drew Brees-- but that didn't matter because Matt Forte buttf**ked the Panthers.

MVP: Forte, as his 30 points represent 29% of ChamPeon's total output.

Least VP: (tie) Anquan Boldin & Tim Hightower. 0.50 between them.

Brad Evans says, "Mighty Matt Forte prevents Brent from looking like CHUMPeon, as he surely would have for benching LeSean "Don't call me Bones" McCoy in favor of former Buckeye Beanie Wells."

What it means: Champ moves into playoff position, while Viano bids farewell to his two-game win streak.