I would like to replace Clinton Portis with Paul McCoy this week.
DELBARTON, W.Va. -- Paul McCoy ran for 658 yards in a high school football game and, believe it or not, might not have set a national record with his feat.
McCoy piled up his yardage on just 29 carries -- an average of 22.7 yards per attempt -- and scored 10 touchdowns as Matewan beat Burch 64-0 on Friday. McCoy racked up 477 of his yards scoring on TD runs of runs, which covered 69, 1, 52, 56, 52, 20, 31, 84, 87 and 25 yards.
He also had a 77-yard TD run called back because of a penalty.
By my calculations, that's 125 fantasy points, assuming he had no catches.
I will again be at church leading up to games, for the second time in four weeks. Hopefully, I don't fall into lineup disasters. Please, Jesus, don't hate.
I dunno, Roger. But I'm personally cheering louder and louder with the end of each inning of the Cubs game -- we're growing closer and closer to no Dusty.
Kurt Warner doesn't seem to care if he keeps his job or not. Another fumble and an INT returned for a TD? JR's team is run by Chad Pennington and Brett Farve from here on out.
I don't know if you guys can watch the Tigers game, or if you are, but it's ridiculous. It's now the bottom of the eleventh with the bases loaded tied at eight.
Detroit was up 6-0, KC came back and took the lead 8-7 in the seventh, Matt Stairs had a pinch-hit homerun in the eighth, and the Tigers had the bases loaded with one out in the eleventh, and didn't put the winning run in.
Plus, the Twins win, so this game decides the division, and we're in the twelfth inning.
64 comments:
If you didn't make it to at least the 2:45 mark, you're out of the league.
I would like to replace Clinton Portis with Paul McCoy this week.
DELBARTON, W.Va. -- Paul McCoy ran for 658 yards in a high school football game and, believe it or not, might not have set a national record with his feat.
McCoy piled up his yardage on just 29 carries -- an average of 22.7 yards per attempt -- and scored 10 touchdowns as Matewan beat Burch 64-0 on Friday. McCoy racked up 477 of his yards scoring on TD runs of runs, which covered 69, 1, 52, 56, 52, 20, 31, 84, 87 and 25 yards.
He also had a 77-yard TD run called back because of a penalty.
By my calculations, that's 125 fantasy points, assuming he had no catches.
I will again be at church leading up to games, for the second time in four weeks. Hopefully, I don't fall into lineup disasters. Please, Jesus, don't hate.
Just so you know- whoever scores the 385th point today will get the honor of scoring the 30,000th in VUFSA history.
Your prize? You get to set JR's lineup for next week.
What's my prize for when I score 385 points today?
You will surpass Baron in the power rankings.
Speaking of Baron- Ahman Green is now Questionable, and there is no budge in his flex spot. Eli holds his breath
Travis Henry inactive. That's what JR gets for going to church.
Also, Wali Lundy is inactive and a peice of crap.
Poor Wali.
Momentum Swing #1: Ahman Green, Questionable is unable to be benched for Dominic Rhodes, who has already scored a TD.
On a scale of 1-10, how excited is Ed that he doesn't have to work on a Sunday?
I have already contacted my doctor, if you know what I mean.
Your team's thundering erection needs to go away as well.
Jimmy Hoffa's body, Mark Prior's wang, a Willis McGahee touchdown.
One of these was finally seen today.
Ed/Dave progress report:
Ed: 49.50
Dave: -1.25
Willis now has more TDs than Larry Johnson
never mind
I told you not to sleep on Kevan Barlow
When you play Dave in Week 13, I'm setting the line at "Ed by 85."
This is ridiculous.
I'm not in these much- does anyone else show up?
Sometimes. Dave on occasion, JR should be around. Stem once showed up drunk and was posting midget porn pictures, but that was awhile ago.
Ed/Dave progress report:
Ed: 72
Dave: 4
The Lord taketh away.
Hey JR.
About 100 points from 30,000
Do you think anyone will commend my rigorous workout routine on the last day of the season?
I dunno, Roger. But I'm personally cheering louder and louder with the end of each inning of the Cubs game -- we're growing closer and closer to no Dusty.
Ed what does THE SPREADSHEET!!!!!!!!!!!! report as the previous lowest scoring matchup in VUFSA history?
The spreadsheet doesn't track game totals, only team averages, jackass.
Larry Johnson: 20 carries, 33 yards against the 49ers? something is amiss.
Herm Edwards is a miss.
Kurt Warner doesn't seem to care if he keeps his job or not. Another fumble and an INT returned for a TD? JR's team is run by Chad Pennington and Brett Farve from here on out.
Regarding: Lowest scoring matchup
Week 5, 2005
Andy Viano: 69.25
Dave Tomke: 42.00
Total: 111.25
In general, I despise quarterbacks. All of them. FUCK!
Seriously, how bad are the Dolphins?
Baron- put the hydrocodone down!
Dave just called me to tell me I'm an asshole.
Then we quoted the fight scene in Anchorman for 3 minutes.
In our defense, this really got out of hand. I mean it jumped up a notch.
I'm wearing clothes from the toilet store.
Jerious Norwood?...putting me out of my misery early, at least. Fuck you, Travis Henry.
Fuck you, JR
Welcome to the god damn game JERIOUS MOTHERFUCKIN' NORWOOD!
Ok, I'm out - enjoy the rest of your Sunday
Nice start, Leinart.
While we're at it, Congratulations to Jerious Norwood, as his 13 point run put the VUFSA over 30,000 points
At least I have things to look forward to. Like not playing Ed for the next long time.
Other things to look forward to:
Cedric Houston getting touches.
Michael Robinson getting touches.
Ron Dayne breaking the 50-yard mark.
Me committing suicide when Ed punishes me by like 200.
Kevan Barlow hates Dave Tomke.
Marty Schottenheimer calls for a fake FG up by 6 in the 4th quarter? That mistake will be legendary.
Seriously? Kevan Barlow with two touchdowns? I didn't have a chance this week.
Also, that video, while weird, was not good enough to sponsor our open thread.
This day keeps getting worse. The Tigers just blew a six-run lead and they're now tied with the Royals 7-7 in the 8th.
GOD DAMMIT. The Lions are probably going to lose by about 100.
Seriously, Miami Dolphins: worst team in the NFL.
Marques Colston is by far the best player on my team.
I still think the Dolphins would beat the Lions.
I don't know if you guys can watch the Tigers game, or if you are, but it's ridiculous. It's now the bottom of the eleventh with the bases loaded tied at eight.
Ridiculous.
Why is that ridiculous?
Detroit was up 6-0, KC came back and took the lead 8-7 in the seventh, Matt Stairs had a pinch-hit homerun in the eighth, and the Tigers had the bases loaded with one out in the eleventh, and didn't put the winning run in.
Plus, the Twins win, so this game decides the division, and we're in the twelfth inning.
I'd say that's pretty ridiculous.
The Cubs President and CEO was just fired.
This is a great, great, great day.
I would say it's the opposite of ridiculous because the Tigers are already in the playoffs and the Royals are the worst team in baseball.
It's more sad than riveting, really.
Ed, don't make me say some disparaging things about the Cubs.
Because I will. Because those sons of bitches traded us Neifi Perez. And I hate them for it.
Baron: 23 points
How many points will McNabb have to score for me tomorrow night?
I really hope that I at least put up respectable numbers in my savage loss to Ed.
Pre-Bears update for the cheapos who won't shell out $9.95 to get statracker:
SKL: 138.50 (Lance Briggs left)
WIRM: 96.75 (Muhammed)
TPB: 71.00 (Driver, Kampman)
FA: 31.50 (McNabb, Strong, Cole)
TNM: 57.50 (Jackson, Akers, Patterson)
NDP: 92.50 (Jennings, Engram, Gould)
CHM: 126.50 (Urlacher)
CD: 104.50 (Stallworth, LJ Smith)
SLM: 132.75 (Morris)
FL: 49.50 (Brown, Westbrook, T. Jones, A. Green?)
I really don't like seeing "Morris" next to my name.
Dave is probably kicking himself for passing on Brandon Lloyd and Samkon Gado for Muhsin Muhammed.
I love Tommie Harris.
What a bad week. So this is what it feels like to have a dick firmly up the ass.
And also, what it feels like to lose badly in fantasy football.
Post a Comment