I am at work, and I cannot stop reading Fire Joe Morgan.
God dammit, this is hilarious. I am having to force myself from laughing out loud. I hate all of you, mainly J.R. and The Gun, I think, for introducing it to me on here. Here's my favorite part:
I've seen Three-Finger Brown shove his whole arm up Honus Wagner's ass when Wagner didn't run out a groundball -- in a goddamn exhibition game!!!! So don't you go telling me about computers!!!!!!!!!!!! Or books!!!!!!!!!!!!! And how they are "good"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Also, the fact that Joe Morgan continually says he doesn't watch teams or read books. Comedic gold.
12 comments:
I'm not sure if this has been mentioned before, but I've twice contributed to Fire Joe Morgan.
But yes, that is now my favorite website. Example:
Case in point: Yahoo!'s Jeff Passan, who's written an article extolling Omar Vizquel's virtues unblushingly titled "Vizquel an artist at work."
In a perfect world, the Steroid Era would have begat the Fundamental Era.
I can already see that Jeff Passan's perfect world is a lot different from mine.
"contributed."
I'm in marketing now. It's all about the language.
Come on, you know that my favorite passage on the website is going to reference anal-fisting.
I especially liked the most recent chat, where Joe stated he's never seen Roger Clemens pitch in a Game 7.
I love that they say Tim McCarver talking reminds them of "a bad wedding toast given by a drunk family friend who’s a high school English teacher."
Just like good scouts do. Good scouts never use scouting tools. They trust their goddamn eyes, and their guts, and their spleens. Why?
Because Old Hoss Radbourn was not discovered with a computer, dargbloomit! He was discovered because 130 year-old Petey "Garbageface" Krunkston, who had been a rookie league manager for 142 years and had seen a goddamn ballgame or two in his day, woke up one morning with a wart shaped like a flame on his left arm, and he turned to his wife of 186 years Edna Mae and he said, "The flame mole's back, darlin.' I's a gone and what been done and moseyed to the ballpark -- there's sure to be a great future prospect a-lurkin' about, iffin' the flame mole done appeared-a-mafied on m'arm!" And he did go down there t' ol' Brasston Park, and sure 'nuff, a 4 year-old Hoss Radbourn was thar, an' he was a-throwin' and a-hittin somethin' fierce! And bloogburrmit if Garbageface didn't sign that 4 year-old right then and there! And he became a Hall-of-Famer!!!!!
Wait, did one of our heroes find our pathetic blog?
On a completely unrelated note, for those of you who need your fix of Zane Teilane, she evidently was signed and activated midway through the season by the Washington Mystics, who are currently in the WNBA playoffs against the Connecticut Suns. Game 2 of the series is Sunday at 12:30 CDT, and should be available on your local ABC affiliate.
-billy
I think so, Ed... I think so.
Wait, did you know that you can post with a hyperlinked username without actually being a blogger?
I just found out myself.
Ed, I had NO idea!
*drool*
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